Looking back and reflecting on life, as many do this time of year, I am extremely happy to say that I am not in the same place. I have progressed greatly. I say this with pride and joy because I live to climb the ladder of progression. I define my own success and my own life but sometimes it gets a little muddy! I made my life so complex and now its so simple.
When people say birds of a feather flock together....they weren't lying. When a snake is in the mist of birds, well you know that snake has got to go. That doesn't mean the snake is suppose to die and be demolished from the world. It just means the snake didn't fit in the group of birds. Why am I talking birds and snakes? Well, that's what happens when you have people who are friends....or think they are friends. Sometimes you have it where one person is friend and the other is a leech...or in terms of my comparison...a snake! Doesn't mean the snake didn't give its best but a snake is a snake. It is a predator that only looks out for self. So no matter how much it tries to blend in and manage among the warm blooded.....it will eventually bite. Being me...I got rid of the snakes last year. I didn't even ring in 2012 with a snake in my circle! A snake will show you its true colors....your job is to believe it when it shows you the truth! Believe it when it shows you it cares nothing about your life, situations, or hardships...only about their life and feed. I'm being vague cause I no longer call folks out by name but........just know I grew weary of trying to be a friend to a snake so.......I let the snake hang itself! LOL! Moving on.
Lost some people this year that was a real shock to me. I was at a loss of words and filled with emotion when good friend passed away in January. It amazes me how cancer can break down a person and the people around them. It changes everyone from the person who has the illness to the people around the person. I just pray that if I'm directly confronted with it again that I take into consideration all that comes with Cancer. Cancer is a sickness that everyone endures and it is much physicall, emotional, and mental pain that comes along with it. At the time I did the best that I could but that person was pushing people away because she knew things were coming to an end. As much as I was in denial...she knew! I kick myself all the time for being in denial....reflecting back all the signs were there! I'm glad her child is able to move on and continue to be a child in this world but I know her family will always carry on the memory of her mother. I'm glad that God saw it fit that I didn't see her death. It would have changed me even more! I just can't believe the snake thought my mourning an old friend was about her....but then again....cold blooded snakes!
My circle of friends are truly friends. They listen, we laugh, they help when needed, they just call to say "I Love You". It's a beautiful thing. I appreciate it and adore it. It's great how when I let go of something or some people I was holding on to how uncomplicated my life became. My relationship is wonderful I never have been so in love and this one is very different from any other ones that I have ever had. I'm thankful. Spiritually I've grown so much. I quickly let go after I have said my peace and I'm little more careful with my words everyday. Growth is a beautiful thing!
My family....things are good. Rebulding in a positive direction and I'm thankful. Accept them for who they are and don't linger on foolishness. After all God made them my family for a reason whether I like it or not!
Future, is nothing but full of promising events and situations. I have goals and plans that I want to work towards. Each time I achieve a goal I set the bar even higher for myself. My career....absolutely loving it. Who knew the chips could fall in place like this by just letting God do his thing? Letting go of baggage and walking by faith. I am absolutely in love with life right now and praying that all I wish and work for will become reality. I mean God has blessed me thus far so why let him down? Will not, can not be me!
So in this summary, Am I in the same place as I was last year. Definitely not! I'm so much better! I have made a vow to myself after last years learning lessons with family and so called friends and real friends to not be the angry black woman! The person you see who is always complaning about everything and thinks the world owes her something. No....not me! I realize I am just a peon in this world but I will still make my mark on the lives that God wants me to affect. Will it always be good? Probably not but we all learn something from each other....good or bad and need to take what we learn and apply it to our lives and move on without malice or hate. Regardless of what people may get out of this I'm just speaking what I have learned....not being malicious or spiteful but hoping to let you know that this is all part of life and growing.
Closing this out in the words of my favorite singer Joi on her song Another Rocker "The leaves turn and life lessons learned but you gotta grow and change or else you'll die!"
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